To the victor goes the swag

I want to thank everyone who participated in yesterday's swag bag give-away. The decision-making process was tough one given the brilliance of the entries.

Kudos to Andy, who produced a missive for a caption, writing:

"Well, I've arrived," thought Miss Amelia O'Reilly, straight from the potato fields of Ireland circa 1850. "Today's the first day of the rest of my life, which will include (but not be limited to) the construction of the first library in the small Scottish town of McHaggis, where I will serve as the first librarian this town has ever seen. This will serve to enlighten the local populace, who will be resentful of me at first but will ultimately be wooed by my ingenuity and spunk. This will lead to a village dance, where I will meet and fall in love with William Wallace (no relation), who won't notice me at first, thanks to the cleavage revealing attire of lusty barmaid Deirdre MacSwain. But William ultimately chooses me over Deidre thanks to my afforemetioned ingenuity and spunk, as well as a "Sandy" from "Grease" style makeover, where I prove that leather is not only used for making shoes or saddles. Now, where did I put my luggage...?"

Mels suggested (after joking that I'd "already gotten started on [my] work for PBS") Confessions of a Pioneer Woman, the Movie as the title, noting, "This would be the part AFTER she married Marlboro Man." Is P.W. aware that her story has become a screenplay...?

Mark proposed I teach Riverdancing for Beginners, while Michael wrote those longing words I've been secretly storing in my heart of hearts, "Tartan's manly, yes, but I like it too." And I do.

The nitty-gritty decision came down to those two submissions that make me laugh every time I read them. They are (in no particular order):
  • These Sturdy Black Brogues are Made for Walking: The Nancy Sinatra story, as retold by the Amish, by Emily Paramore
  • School Marm II: Revenge of the Ruler, by Diana.

After much wringing of hands and wailing (or, perhaps not), and a coin toss (well, maybe) the winner is...

These Sturdy Black Brogues are Made for Walking:
The Nancy Sinatra story, as retold by the Amish

Congratulations Emily Paramore! You're the winner of a fabulous swag bag.


Diana said...

Damn you, Emily, and your witty wit!

Andy said...

Congratulations, Emily! I now despise you.


Emily Piznaramore said...

Aw yeah! I win, I win! In YOUR FACE, Mels and Andy and you other suckers who DID NOT WIN! I can smell your bitterness from here. Or maybe that's my sweater underarms . . .

Mels said...

Emily kills me. Slays, in fact.

I think it is your sweater. Here, have a side car.